|George Buster Singleton|
(For decades, local historian and paranormal investigator George “Buster” Singleton published a weekly newspaper column called “Somewhere in Time.” The column below, which was titled “We want a fairy world? Then bring on the fairies” was originally published in the Nov. 8, 1990 edition of The Monroe Journal in Monroeville, Ala.)
I have been to three state fairs and several goat ropings, and I have never seen the likes of what passes through the minds of the American people. If one can keep their sanity after an evening of watching the boob tube, it is nothing short of a miracle.
Our news media has gone into such detail about our shortcomings within our military until I’m sure that our friend, Saddam of Iraq, knows what type of spark plugs our Army jeeps has in their engines. We have heard the opinions of every person from the janitors and waiter boys in Washington to the brigades of the retired military personnel about when the war in the Middle East will begin.
Perhaps, I may be a little old-fashioned, but I was taught during my military training to keep my big mouth shut and let the enemy keep guessing as to what was going to happen. We have told friend Saddam all the weaknesses of our chemical warfare equipment. We have informed him of the problems that his desert sand is doing to our Army tanks, not to mention a thousand other problems that we think might happen. No one believes that our military force is capable of kicking the teeth in of the Iraqi Army. We have become a nation of cry babies and excuse finders.
Our history is being taught in our schools, not as it happened, but like our fairy world would have liked for it to have happened. The bold truth that should be passed on to our youth has been pushed aside and watered down in such a way until no one can relay the actual happenings, even if they wanted to. We do not learn from our mistakes anymore, we just push them aside or hide them under the bed and grope in the dark.
Our politicians waste taxpayers’ money, trying to reach an agreement on our budget; they have spent millions of our tax dollars arguing back and forth on trivial matters. Yet, they spent less than 30 minutes voting themselves a $35,000 annual raise. The art of mud slinging is more important now than being able to read or write among our Congress members. All want something for nothing. But, these are all just trivial matters; the most pressing problem is yet to come.
In watching the world news tonight, we are faced with a most grave and serious decision that has to be made within a very short time. The Middle East crisis will have to be put on hold, along with the many other serious matters, such as the savings and loan crisis and finding money to pay for a trip to Mars.
This most grave and serious matter is whether or not we Americans are going to allow our hero, Superman, to take himself a bride. Laugh, if you will, but this is something serious. And, the frightening thing is, it doesn’t stop there. Are we going to allow Superman and his bridge, Lois, to have children? Now, readers, I have seen some hairy times in my lifetime, but this situation is really getting hairy. Just think what our world will be like, having a little Superman following his father around up there in the skies, and our hero having to stop fighting bad men to change little Superman’s dirty diaper. Our world as we know it is at stake. According to the news, we are facing difficult times.
I haven’t been contacted on the matter yet, but I just might vote for him to take himself a bride. After all, being a little henpecked might be just what this gentleman needs. And, should I get a wedding invitation, and they decide to have the wedding on some planet, like Mars or Jupiter, I might have to decline the invite. I don’t believe my good dress suit would survive the trip.
I didn’t mean to upset anyone with this serious matter. I just thought that I might, in some way, help to prepare all of you to face this decision that is sure to come before us in the very near future. I look any day for the great minds of Congress to have to come up with this grave and important issue that could change all our lives for generations to come. I know that this will be a very serious matter to them.
But be of strong hearts, the winds of politics carry the rumors that Mickey Mouse or Freddie the Frog just might be seeking a seat in Congress. A little strange maybe, but they just might do a better job than some of those that are up there now. If we are to live in a fairy world, I think that we should bring on the fairies.
Getting back to the business of being serious, I believe with all my heart that our great and beautiful country is at the crossroads in time. We have been allowed to be a part of the greatest civilization that the world has ever known. If we sit idle and let this which we have, slip through our grasp, our days are numbered; the cries of our children will ride the winds of oblivion for a thousand years, or until time’s end, which ever comes first.
(Singleton, the author of the 1991 book “Of Foxfire and Phantom Soldiers,” passed away at the age of 79 on July 19, 2007. A longtime resident of Monroeville, he was born on Dec. 14, 1927 in Marengo County, graduated from Sweet Water High School, served in the Korean War, moved to Monroe County in 1961 and served as the administrator of the Monroeville National Guard unit from 1964 to 1987. For years, Singleton’s column “Somewhere in Time” appeared in The Monroe Journal, and he wrote a lengthy series of articles about Monroe County that appeared in Alabama Life magazine. He is buried in Pineville Cemetery in Monroeville. The column above and all of Singleton’s other columns are available to the public through the microfilm records at the Monroe County Public Library in Monroeville. Singleton’s columns are presented here each week for research and scholarship purposes and as part of an effort to keep his work and memory alive.)